It's time for the Insecure Writer's Support Group, created by Alex J. Cavanaugh, wherein we writers share our insecurities with the group.
This one's going to be brief for me, but it's something weighing heavily on my mind. Right now, my fear/insecurity is that I will not find any measure of success with my writing in time for my parents to see it. I want to be able to show them that their support since I was a kid talking about growing up to be a writer meant something, that it helped me reach this point, that it's come to fruition. But it all seems so far away that I worry it won't happen in time. While I realize they're my parents and have faith in me, I don't want them to HAVE to have faith that it will happen; I want them to get to see it with their own eyes.
Now for a few links!
Accepting Submissions:
Running Out of Ink is accepting submissions of short fiction, any genre. Not a paying market.
Sword and Laser is accepting submissions for an anthology. Sci-fi and Fantasy themed. Deadline May 15. Pays $200.
Contests:
Potomac Review is hosting a flash fiction contest. Theme: Brackish. Deadline April 5. $1000 first prize, plus publication in the Potomac Review, and a one-year subscription to the Potomac Review. $20 entry fee.
Wild Thoughts is hosting The Best of Times Short Story Competition for humorous short stories. Deadline is May 31. First prize is $200. Entry fee is $6.
Blog Hops/Memes:
LiteraryCO (Colorado) is hosting Colorado Book Month, which includes a weekly themed meme in the month of March, as well as guest posts with Colorado authors and bloggers (yours truly, included), and lots of other fun stuff. You don't have to be a Coloradan to participate.
Just for Fun:
Emily Temple shared 25 Fascinating Photos of Famous Writers at Home on Flavorwire.
Anything interesting to share? Anything you're interested in above? What are your writing insecurities?
May you find your Muse.
37 comments:
I can completely relate to this, Shannon. I'm the youngest of four children, with a healthy gap between me and the eldest. My dad turns 70 in July, and neither he or my mother are in what I'd call great health.
I can't tell you how badly I wanted to get something published and dedicated to them before they were unable to see it. Was truly one of the biggest things pushing me through all of those days I wanted to give up on writing because I felt I had no real talent for it.
And here was the kicker: When it did finally happen, it was a type of story I wasn't entirely sure they'd approve or even want to talk about.
"Hey Mom, I know you always wanted to be a writer yourself, and always felt I had the talent to do whatever I wanted in music, writing, art, etc. Well I finally published something! It's about an irreverent girl who swears a bunch and kills scary things. Hope you're proud!" lol
On top of that, I think they were still under the impression I was writing stuff for teenagers and younger readers. I told them beforehand that it wasn't maybe their cup of tea. But honestly, I just think they were too damned happy/proud to listen or care. Mom told all of my aunts and uncles they had to buy copies (most of whom are ultra-concervative folks, btw). The snowball was rolling, as they say. :)
That brings me to the point of all this: They were proud of me because I was proud of myself. They didn't care what I had written, they just knew that I finally felt like I'd reached a very important goal, and they were thrilled for me. If I had been as excited about getting a rosebush planted in my yard it would've made them equally happy I think.
So be proud of yourself--in every little accomplishment in your writing life. Be it a blog post you've nailed, a contest you've entered--whatever. And above all, share that pride and part of your life with your folks. That's what they really want--to see you happy and working toward your dreams.
I kept my parents out of that part of my life for too long thinking they wouldn't care or might consider me not accomplished enough to care as much as I did. I was wrong to do that, I think. :)
My dad passed so long ago - way before I ever had time to pursue my writing, though he knew I always wanted to. He's with me in spirit, and sometimes, I think he might even be helping me with the work. Love and memories are powerful stuff. Worry and anxiety cause way too much trouble. Let it go and trust that things will always be as they are meant to be. Give yourself the gift of peace and keep moving forward, Shannon. Wishing you all the best, and that things settle down soon. M. J.
We can all understand! As a parent of a singer/songwriter I can tell you that anything she writes/sings speaks to my heart, fills me with immense joy and pride. To find her voice, her style, her courage to be who she wanted to be took time and energy.
The work we do is important enough, regardless of who appreciates it, who purchases it, who praises it. Go forth and create!
To some degree, I believe we all feel this way. I want to see some kind of success before I die.
Hugs and chocolate,
Shelly
I bet you're parents are proud. yes it's hard that you can't show them your success, but I bet they already view you as a successful person. Still I wish you the best and pray that your parents CAN see it, becasue that has to be hard.
I definitely share your insecurity about your parents not seeing your success.
That's a tough one, for sure...
ooh awesome links! Oh we have the same fears, Shannon. I wish writing an getting published were things that didn't take way too much time to accomplish.
Nutschell
www.thewritingnut.com
Is there ever a time when you're not behind? :P
It's good to have that kind of support. After 2 years of my book being out and about, my parents have finally asked about reading it and had me send a copy. I think that only happened because someone my mom knows said she has a copy of House and it kind of woke my mom up.
I was talking about this yesterday with my family. Not about your parents, of course. It was about my grandfather and how much I would have loved for him to see some of the things I've done in his honor. Mother Dragon said she believed he sees them wherever he is, but it's not the same. So...just try as hard as you can.
Shannon....I am certain your parents are more than proud of all your accomplishments in life.
My Mother is 84, I am her caretaker and I told her I have a terrible headache today... She said well, your always on your computer..I explained why, and I can see that just at my level in the writing world..which is very low at this point...she has a proud look on her face. Same when I am crocheting..she loves everything.
I am certain your referring to a book, you want them to be proud of you and your book...I hope you will be able to reach your goal on that one. They know it is difficult and some writers take years and years to write just one book. I have personally been talking about it since childhood myself, and have yet to get a chapter 1.
I have already visited 135 blogs today...more actually but a lot of them either closed their blogs down or didn't post. I am going to do just half the list. I need to do other things that are just as important, and I am okay with that. In checking my own....I saw 20 visitors....Ha Ha...All good ones though, and will reply this evening.
Your a wonderful supportive person and I understand how you feel. I love my Mom very much and want her to be proud of me too! Sandy of www.sandysanderellasmusings.blogspot.com.......
Shannon,
While my opinion doesn't matter at all. I know that you will find the success you seek sooner than later. You are a great writer.
Shannon, show them your blog, if nothing else. This proves you are a great writer and read by many!
I know how you feel about wanting your parents to see your success. My dad died a few years ago so he'll never see any of my books in print and my mom is getting old and now thinks I have a book coming out when in fact I don't even have an agent. *sigh*
E.J., that's wonderful to hear. I love what you said about the rosebush. Thanks for all you said.
M.J., that lovely. You're right; it isn't necessary stress.
Rosaria, I loved hearing it from the parent's POV! Go forth and create, indeed!
Shelly, that is definitely true, too.
J.A., thank you, you're right. I know that they're proud of what I've done so far. I just want that one big thing. ;-p
Mark, it is. I hope we both make good on it.
Schell, thanks! Yes, the time is overwhelming sometimes.
Andrew, nope! LOL. But there are days where I'm caught up and I'm so darned happy. I just can't keep up with everything going on. I'm glad your mom asked after the book, even if something sort of prodded her into it.
Ah, Al, I think that's part of why that's on my mind. My father-in-law and a grandmother I was very close to both died before we were able to have kids. It's a regret nothing can be done about.
Sandy, yes, a book. Thank you for your kind words. I hope you can get that book written, but I love what you said about her being proud already.
Julie, of course your opinion matters! And thank you.
Alex, aw, thank you!
Marcy, I'm sorry :( That is what I fear.
I know just what you mean. Sadly, both my mom and dad have passed away, and I'm still unsuccessful. I never "proved" myself to them and I never will. Now I just need to prove myself to me.
Good luck! :-)
I feel the same way with my parents. My dad's always been excited about my writing, but my mom's more indifferent about it because I'm not, you know, Stephen King yet. I'd like to be able to show her some genuine success.
Also, as the others have said, that success will come to you. And we're not saying that just to be nice. You have the talent. Use it.
They are probably already proud of you Shannon. Our parents see and know much more than we realize...
The writing journey IS a drawn out process, which I'm sure they are well aware of.
Wow, that's a tough one. Both my parents passed away before I was a published author. But you know, I think they know. I feel them sometimes near me, warm, caring, protective. I hope your parents live long enough to see you published, Shannon. Happy IWSG.
My writing worries? Time, I think. Do I have enough time to get it all done?
Hi Shannon, Parents have a special place in our lives don't they?! And thank you for the links. I am now trying to use the hyperlink info you shared on A to Z. God bless, Maria from Delight Directed Living
Lexa, I'm sorry to hear that. I think proving ourselves to ourselves is the most important.
Bryan (& Brandon), thanks for the pep talk!
Michelle, thanks, I hope so.
Joylene, that is reassuring to hear, as my dad is very ill.
Susan, there is never enough time!
Maria, excellent, it worked!
I think you should give up on the desire for your parents to see the results of their support in a respected author as their daughter. Let go of your desire to please and write for yourself. Your parents' love is unconditional.
Shannon,
You wrote: "Right now, my fear/insecurity is that I will not find any measure of success with my writing in time for my parents to see it." I see where you're coming from, and I totally understand why you might feel this way. But that said, I also feel you have demonstrated success as a writer in ways that would make your parents proud.
Look at your blog, for instance. You have 600+ followers (and you'd get a ton more in April, I bet) There are so many bloggers out there who would be so blessed if they could have even a quarter of your fan base here.
And the vibe I get from you when I visit your blog and read your comments on my blog is that you are a kind person, a writer who wants to help other writers. That, to me, shows a kind of personal and professional success that not everyone, even those who are considered "successes" in their fields, can always pull off.
Thank you for sharing about your insecurity, and I hope my comment would make you feel a little better.
This is so touching, Shannon. I know what you mean. I hope your parents get to see your books some day soon.
Wow, yes. Just yes. I understand so well. Now that I have gone with indie publishing and my parents share my books with everyone they meet, I do feel more at peace. But I'm not married and the idea that they won't be around if I ever do meet the right person haunts me. Just as mortality of others always haunts me more than any worries about my own ending. But these fears can't be allowed to run rampant and the only bandaid I know is to keep serving your purpose, working on your writing, and trust that things will happen when they are supposed to. Thanks for the post!
Worries?Everything. Happy International Women's Day, Shannon!
First I have to thank you for stopping by my blog and bringing two more Colorado Authors to my attention. One of the things I want to focus on is supporting local authors, but have been struggling to find them.
Second, I've been perusing and really enjoying your blog. Keep it up! I look forward to getting to know you!
Hi Shannon,
I'm writing this on behalf of my human, Gary. We both understand your concerns. The inspiration and support that your parents provided you with, is the catalyst that drives your passion for the written word.
Like the human Alex notes, show them your blog and all you do. I know that my human doesn't have his own dad, who may or may not be alive, support his writing.
And his family in Canada are not that aware of what he writes. Still, he writes on, undaunted, even though in his case, writing is a therapeutic and cathartic endeavour he likes to share and give hope to others with.
All the best, Shannon and have a peaceful weekend.
Pawsitive wishes,
Penny :)
So understandable, and I think all writers relate in some way.
For me it's to prove I wasn't the idiot they always claimed I was. Most of my life they've claimed I would never amount to anything, I was too stupid, too ugly, and a waste of space.
While I've proven them wrong on so many counts, that little girl, still feels the barbs! Only good thing, it's made me who I am and aided much with the writing!
I feel this exact same way with my grandparents--I want them to be able to see and appreciate my work before it's too late. (I'll leave aside my fears of them hating it for the moment!) I like your attitude about it though, such a good thing to keep in mind! (Great list of links, too!)
Hi Shannon,
I found you through the A to Z April challenge.
I relate to your sense of urgency to publish while your parents are around to celebrate with you and bask in the glory of having supported you. Heck, I'm afraid I'll never get published in time to celebrate myself--the publishing world is such a black box nowadays. Good luck to you.
Jagoda at www.conflictango.com
BTW--I tried inserting the signature link but got the message that the "http" reference is not accepted. Probably user error on my part.
I know it is so wonderful to be recognized, but your parents are proud of you for your "journey."
Oh, Shannon. I hope things work out, but I'm guessing they know.
For me, what drove me to get back into writing after nearly 20 years away from it was regret that I would have when I was old and gray. I've released two indie books and have another planned for this year. It's not exactly the "home run" we dream of; i.e., book deal, movie deal, writing full-time. However, at least I know I've tried.
My parents know this and seem very proud. I hope yours do, too. *waves*
-Jimmy
http://jamesgarciajr.blogspot.com/
My mom never got to read any of my writing, but my dad has read two of my unpublished novels. His response after reading both of those were enough for me. :)
Shannon, sorry I am a little late to this, but I have felt the same way. Mostly it involves my grandmother, though. Having not written for so long, and now just starting fresh again, I fear I won't ever have anything substantial to honor her support during her lifetime (or mine for that matter).
I try to counter-balance this by knowing that she is already proud of me. Proud of me for following my heart and passion. I try to understand that my worries/fears are self-induced, and I'm the only one aware of them.
I am sure your parents, friends and family are all proud of you!
Francene, you're right, and I know you are. I can't help it quite yet, but I'm working on it.
Cynthia, I've read your comment a few times, and it touches my heart every time. I appreciate your kind words, thank you.
Kelly, thank you, me, too!
Julie, that was well said. Thank you, you're absolutely right.
Carole, that, too. Thank you!
Teresa, man, I can pass on all kinds of good Colorado authors! And be happy to.
Penny, I am sad to hear that about Gary's family. But we all support him here in the blogosphere.
Yolanda, that breaks my heart. I'm glad you've reached a positive place, but I'm sorry that was put on you for so long.
Meradeth, I hope they get to see your writing and love it!
Jagoda, someone else was having a similar issue, and it was a copy/paste problem. Try typing it out and see if it works.
Loverofwords, I'm sure you're right. My parents are always supportive, no matter what.
Jimmy, thank you! Your parents should definitely be proud.
DL, that is good to hear! Maybe I should just give the unfinished ones to my dad to read while he can. That would be something, at least.
Jak, I hope your grandmother gets to see your writing, but I'm glad that you are able to see that she is proud of you, no matter what.
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